Actually, I was kinda hoping for a MovieZeal review on The Butterfly Effect someday….

“He was dead…but he got better.”

Oh!I see,you didn’t include that one beacause it doesn’t count as a movie,considering that Jason Statham and Geri Halliweall are involved,right?

I actually think it’s funny that taglines haven’t really gotten all that much better at describing films over the years. Where once a movie might be announced as “Thrills in Technicolor!” now it’s “the 3D Adventure of the Summer!” Both of which are fine, I suppose, but is there anyone…ANYWHERE…who would be enticed to buy a ticket based on 10 words or less sensationalism?

Then again, I haven’t spent much time in the Midwest (yeah, a cheap shot I know…).

Thanks for coming by, Joseph — it’s good to see that not everyone at Slant hates us. (And if you don’t know why, please don’t ask…I’d rather not open up that can of worms again.)

*New York City: It’s a nice place to visit, but you wouldn’t want to die there!*

Still, this is a great list, even if I’m cursing you under my breath for reminding me of the torture that was “Kangaroo Jack”. He stole 1.5 hours of my life…and he’s not giving them back!

8. Fair enough, but they should have made the pun a little clearer…y’know, like “Sea, know evil!” or something. See, it took me about two seconds to come up with that one.

1. I get it. And you notice I did say “AWESOMELY stupid.” And also, that it didn’t make my list.

Luke,
10. Probably. I get accused of doing that a lot. But even Eastern philosophy began at some point, so any movie based on Eastern philosophy could be said to begin when Eastern philosophy began.
8. I can’t imagine what else it would be (besides stupid, I mean). And bee tea dub, of course they’re telling you your life goal should be to see evil if they made a movie about evil. It’s called marketing.
5. Yeah, I suppose that’s true.
1. Hey, I like that tagline! It’s making fun of that awful shirt that says “Pink is the new Black” and a lot of other terrible things.

Also, since when does the Butterfly Effect’s plot need to make sense? I mean, if the rest of it had no continuity, why would the alternate ending?

Also, Thadd:

10. Not if you study enough Eastern philosophy. Or are you trying to impose your Western, imperialist values on the world?

8. Like I say, it’s not entirely obvious whether this one is supposed to be a pun.

5. The point isn’t a thematic one. The point is that they picked strange bits of content to put in the tagline. Why not “Action, adventure, and magic,” or something? Conflict is what sells, not peace.

4. I’m aware of that, but the point is the two terms are virtually synonymous, and thus rob the tagline of all subtlety (see also: Kanagroo Jack).

1. No, because that was the setup, not the storyline. And also, they didn’t put it in the tagline (although the actual tagline, “Twelve is the new eleven,” is also kind of awesomely stupid).

10. Well, whatever else it may be, I guess it’s at least true….
8. I dunno, I kind of like it. Puns are funny.
5. You kind of hurt your argument here by what you say about Rocky. Just because a movie has a war in it doesn’t mean it’s not about peace, just like the climatic moment in Rocky took place in the squared circle, but it’s not about boxing. A movie could show one thing (e.g. war) and still be about another (peace).
4. Yes, there’s a difference. In sports, when people talk about “being a champ” or “showing he’s a champ” they refer to the heart great champions show. Any fool can rise to the top given the right circumstances (see Mike Tyson) but true champs show their mettle by battling it out and taking on opponents considered to be better than they are (see 2007 New York Giants). But yeah, that is a really crappy tagline.
3. I have heard the director wanted to end this movie by having Kutcher go back to before he was born and strangle himself while he’s still in the womb using the umbilical cord (no, I’m not making this up… I really wish I could say I was) which could be what the tagline refers to.
1. Well… in Ocean’s Twelve they had to give back the money they stole in Ocean’s Eleven. Does that count?