Our grand plan for this week to review the revenge thriller Taken starring Liam Neeson was thwarted by the Hollywood suits when they decided to dump the film into the February graveyard at the flick of a wrist. (I knew there was something odd going on when I had not seen a lick of marketing for the flick) I’m sure we’ll tackle it in a few months, but for now we’ve turned our attention to more sociological concerns, namely the punk lifestyle.

In Episode 6 we discuss What We Do Is Secret, play a few brief clips from my interview with the director, Rodger Grossman, briefly touch on the My Little Pony infatuation I had in kindergarten, drink some fabulous punky wine that comes with its own dress-up doll, rant and rave over Sid & Nancy which Heather forced me to watch, and discuss her former life as an “Alterna-Girl” (her words, not mine).

Also, you can now subscribe to the MovieZeal Podcast on iTunes, which is where all the cool kids hang out and listen to punk music. And don’t forget to write us at podcast [at] moviezeal [dot] com with suggestions for next episode’s opening clip.

 

 Episode 6 - Punks [37:18m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Comedy, more than any other genre, is like a friend. A great comedy makes you laugh a lot and never overstays its welcome. Any great friend should do the same, as well as occasionally pick up the tab for dinner. On the other hand, we’ve all had friends who just aren’t funny – they may be good people, but every joke they tell falls flat. When comedy fails, it’s often painful bear witness to, and if you will allow me to carry this metaphor to its extreme conclusion, David Schwimmer’s Run Fatboy Run would probably be a manic depressive friend.
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So the site has been a little molasses-like lately; the above picture provides clues to my absence. The production company I work for is currently filming two episodes of our puppet-filled kid’s show, Pahappahooey Island. Yours truly is the script supervisor, and in between 13 hour work days and making sure Puppet #3’s ray blaster doesn’t magically switch hands from scenes 33 to 34, I have had no time to regale you with film reviews and sparkling commentary. Come Friday life returns to normal and the site should as well. In the mean time, some of these things called “movies” are being released on this new technology called “DVD.” You might find such things of interest.

Jellyfish –
In a week full of quality releases, this is my number one pick. This tiny Israeli film about the casually intersecting lives of 3 women took me completely off guard. It’s not about plot or even character, but evoking a distinct mood. I expected to be bored to tears, but instead I was absolutely enchanted. Jellyfish worked some kind of black magic over me, and while I hesitate to recommend it since it is such a unique flavor, I can’t contain my enthusiasm for it.

Recommended if you liked Lost In Translation.

Bigger, Stronger, Faster* –
It’s been a great year for docs: Man On Wire, American Teen, Up the Yangtze, and now Bigger, Stronger, Faster: The Side Effects of Being American. Ostentatiously about the controversy surrounding performance enhancing drugs in competitive athletics, it ends up becoming something so much more. One part personal journey, one part info-intense breakdown of drug abuse, one part sociological commentary, this is one of the year’s best films. Watch Oscar screw it over come February.

Recommended if you liked Pumping Iron or Sicko.

Iron Man -
A teensy-weensy film about this dude in an iron suit clocks in at #3. A great summer blockbuster in a summer filled with a surprising number of great blockbusters (The Dark Knight, Speed Racer, Hellboy 2), this could have potentially been another Daredevil, Elektra, or (shudder) Catwoman, if not for one mitigating factor: Mr. Downey Jr. If Johnny Depp can get nominated for Pirates of the Caribbean, then why the heck can’t Robert snag a nomination? Especially since he pulled a second killer punch with his scene-stealing turn in Tropic Thunder?

Recommended if nothing would make you happier than attaching a rocket powered ordinance to every one of your appendages.

| Buy Iron Man on Blu-ray

OSS 117: Cairo, Nest of Spies
This is a gem of a film, and if there was ever an excuse to use mise-en-scène (which is basically a French term for the “look” or overall “feel” of a film that pretentious people like to bandy about), this is it. Not only is the film French, but it has the most giddily preposterous aesthetic I’ve seen in a long time. The film is shot to look like a cheezy 1950s spy flick, what a James Bond knock-off might have looked like back in the day, replete with goofy special effects and over-the-top slapstick. This is a one-of-a-kind film that needs to be experienced to be believed. Peruse Daniel Getahun’s excellent review on it.

Recommended if James Bond is too serious and Austin Powers is too silly, but by golly you’ve just gotta watch a spy flick.

Hit the jump for the rest of the selections, which are by no means shabby propositions.

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This review was originally published May 5th, 2008.

It wasn't subtlety that helped Captain America sell 1 million copies of its first issue.

Comic book super heroes have historically been a political and sociological representation of America’s frame of mind. Superman grew out of depression era grievances, fighting corrupt politicians and championing social causes; the X-Men, birthed in the sixties, were metaphors for diversity and racial justice; and the first issue of Captain America, who was a blatant patriotic creation, featured the star spangled hero slugging Adolf Hitler in the jaw.

Which brings us to Iron Man circa 2008. His alterego, Tony Stark, is an arrogant, absurdly rich weapons designer who thinks he is God’s gift to the military machine. Visiting Afghanistan for a demonstration of his latest Make-Stuff-Go-Big-Boom war toy, he is ambushed by Afghan rebels wielding his own weaponry and drug off as a hostage. Escaping, he sees the error of his warring ways and swears off weaponry forever, opting instead to build himself a technologically advanced iron suit in order to right his past wrongs. He then goes back and lays waste to rebels who imprisoned him, under the auspices of liberating abused villagers.

Let me go over that again. An arrogant American recklessly feeds global conflict, is attacked by terrorists using his own weapons, and then seeks retribution in the name of freeing an oppressed people. And this all takes place in the Middle East. I smell a metaphor.
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This review was originally published July 28th, 2008.

Before we even see the full title of Bigger, Stronger, Faster*, director Christopher Bell essentially gives us his life story. He and his two brothers grew up in the U.S. in the 1980’s—the era of enormous musclemen. Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone were huge at the box office, and Hulk Hogan was rocking the arena in the WWF. As members of a family who were husky by nature, Bell and his two brothers became obsessed with bulking out, leading them into the worlds of college football, professional wrestling, weightlifting, and bodybuilding—where the pressure to be the biggest, the strongest, and—yes—the fastest was insurmountable. All three of them turned to steroids, not necessarily to be the best—but merely to meet status quo. And on their way to adulthood, they realized all their heroes—Sly, Arnold, the Hulk—had done the same.

It’s only then that the title appears on the screen: Bigger, Stronger, Faster*: *The Side Effects of Being American.
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This review was originally published July 28th, 2008.

An unkempt woman sits by herself on the beach, both physically and emotionally alone. Her only companion is the endless ocean, but it is the perfect one. And then a little girl appears, wearing only a red and white inner tube, walking out of the waves like Neptune’s daughter herself. Her striking blue eyes are intensely innocent, and damp red ringlets surround a cherub’s face. She stops next to the woman, saying nothing, only staring unblinkingly. The woman looks back, confused and amazed and wondering. Then she stands up, turns to leave, and the watery nymph follows her.

It is a moment of astonishing beauty and it took my breath away when I saw it. Jellyfish is a film filled with such moments.
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Yeah, so this is, like a day late. Or two. I must be turning into Evan. (I keed! I keed!)

Actually, there’s a real reason that these have been later, lately (huh?). When we started the site, I had a cushy dayjob where all I had to do was sit around in a cubicle all day and do nothing. That gave me copious amounts of time to write blog posts. Then the economy tanked (lousy Republicans! or Democrats! pretty much whichever you’d like to hear me blame!), and I understandably got laid off. So not only do I not have hours and hours where I sit in front of a computer with nothing to do anymore, I’m actually working two jobs (one part-time, one freelance) in an effort to, y’know, keep my cat well-fed. (You should see how he looks at me. So sad. So smelly.) So these might be a bit more erratic, unless of course I suddenly develop some discipline. (By the way, I’m not looking for your pity — just your money.)

Anyway, what? Oh yeah, movies. Once again, these are in the order of my level of interest, which changes by the hour.

Miracle at St. Anna
Well, yeah. Of course St. Anna does miracles. She’s a friggin’ saint. But aside from that, this one looks pretty awesome. Provocateur-director Spike Lee (Do the Right Thing, Bamboozled, She Hate Me) tackles a World War II picture? It’s an idea that’s so good, you wonder why it hasn’t happened before. This one follows the all-black American 92nd Infantry Division, who get stranded in a small Tuscan village and come across a priceless artifact. Looks kind of like a cross between a war film, a mystery/thriller, and — yes — a Spike Lee movie.

Recommended if you liked Windtalkers, Three Kings, or Summer of Sam

Eagle Eye
Yes, it has Shia LaBeouf. And yes, apparently I’m the only one who doesn’t realize how awful he is. (Come on, guys — was he really that bad in Indy 4? I’m not sending him any fan mail or anything, but I wasn’t shaken to the core by how awful he was, the way everyone else seems to be. Whatever.) But they’ve paired him with Michelle Monahghan (Gone Baby Gone) and it looks like they’ve put together a nifty little thriller. Apparently, some terrorists frame them for crimes and force them to commit heinous acts. Y’know — the usual.

Recommended if you like 24 or the Bourne trilogy, or you wish 88 Minutes hadn’t sucked

Fireproof
Yes, it’s a “Christian movie” (whatever that dubious phrase may mean). And yes, “Christian movies” usually suck. But it looks as though they may be finally coming into their own. Yeah, I know that’s what they said about One Night with the King. And Facing the Giants. And — frighteningly — even Left Behind. But this one has some potential, and advance reviews have been pretty good. This one is about a firefighter who has to rebuild his marriage — and he does it with Jesus’ help, not through the triumph of the human spirit. That makes it a hard sell, but give it a chance and I don’t think you’ll be (entirely) disappointed.

Recommended if Ladder 49 didn’t have enough “Jesuses per minute” for you

And…more after the jump.

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Seeing as this little game is first come first serve, I’m going to go ahead and establish a consistent time. So every Wednesday at 11AM Central Standard Time a new one will go live (east coast people add an hour, west coast people subtract 2, and mountain people…well, the less said about the mountain people the better). You can set your watches by it. Also, I’m going to follow Fletch’s lead and start scoring points, because everything is better with cutthroat competition. 1 point for the EASY poster, 2 points for the HARD one. So, here ya go…

Guess away in the comments section. Scoreboard after the jump…
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After the glut that was last week’s release schedule (Racer and Heart and Europa oh my!), things have calmed down a bit. And not in a “whew, I needed a rest from all that good movie watchin’!” kind of way, but in a “help, I’ve been shot in the groin!” kind of way. On closer inspection, I’m not entirely sure that last sentence made any sense, but I’m sticking with it.

Slacker Uprising
I’m no Michael Moore fan. I find him somewhat funny, I appreciate what he achieves in a cinematic sense, but I like my documentaries to make a solid run at objectivity, even if it isn’t fully attainable. Maybe it has more to do with my dislike of belief systems being rammed down my throat, but whatever it is, he’s not my field trip buddy. All that said, his last film, Sicko, managed to be about a little bit more than just his raging ego, and his new film, Slacker Uprising, is being released onto the world wide webs absolutely free of charge. Yup. Totally free. It follows his whirlwind tour throughout small and big town America recruiting voters from amongst the notoriously lazy college demographic. Did I mention it was free? (if you insist on paying for free things, you can snag it for $10 from Amazon…just sayin’) And free makes it the #1 pick of the week. That and none of the other options are really sizzling my fajita, if you know what I mean.

Recommended if…do I really need to finish this sentence? Nope, I didn’t think so.

The Foot Fist Way
The little movie that made Danny McBride an insta-star. The cantankerous comedic dunderhead used his role in this uber-low budget film about a clueless martial arts instructor to parlay his way into Pineapple Express, Tropic Thunder, and the upcoming Land of the Lost beside Will Ferrell. Man’s agent needs to cut back on the double macchiatos. This film strikes me as an unpleasantly mean version of Napolean Dynamite, or what you would get if Ralph Macchio’s Karate Kid had done too much acid, been kicked one too many times in the man jewels, discovered that dreams really do die horrible deaths, and then become a children’s Tai Kwan Do instructor at the bitter age of 38.

Recommended if you felt McBride’s character in Pineapple Express needed even more physical abuse and gunshot wounds.

Leatherheads
On paper this idea looks charming: a screwball comedy in the vein of Frank Capra or Howards Hawks about the origins of American football, starring George Clooney, Renée Zellweger, and Jon Krasinski. But somewhere the train left the tracks, and this one left critics and audiences cold. More interesting was all of the drama behind Clooney’s battle to get a writing credit on the film, claiming that he had substantially rewritten the script (which had sat on the shelf for 17 years). The WGA said “Suck it,” so Clooney went all “financial core” on their butts (I don’t know what that means, but apparently it means business).

Recommended if you liked It Happened One Night, His Girl Friday, or The Hudsucker Proxy (but don’t expect much if you did).

| Buy Leatherheads on Blu-ray
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Shane West as Darby Crash, in Rodger Grossman's

As a film critic, it’s beneficial to see things from the other side of the silver screen every now and then, to know that there are real people and real passions behind many of the films I nonchalantly bang out 600 words on. Granted, film criticism would die as an art if every critic took into account the blood that was shed for each film, but speaking with those doing the bleeding from time to time puts things in perspective.

And if anyone has ever shed blood for a film, it’s Rodger Grossman, director of the Darby Crash biopic What We Do Is Secret (you can find my review here). Extremely gracious with his time, I had the chance to speak with Rodger on the phone for over an hour about his labor of love, what the original band members’ reaction to it was, and whether or not he pays any attention to film critics. The edited transcript is below.

Evan Derrick: I’m always fascinated by complex or dramatic production stories, and I know that you had some real difficulties getting the film made. How long have you been working on it?

Rodger Grossman: Well, I’ve been working on this movie for about 15 years.

ED: That is a long time.

RG: It is a long time. If you want to pick a type of project that’s hard to make, I couldn’t imagine anything more difficult than this: it’s a biopic of someone who is not well known, there’s homosexuality, intravenous drug use, punk rock, a young cast that is not well known. There’s not really room for the type of main actors that fund this sort of movie, so it’s a miracle that it exists. And it really only exists for one reason: people were passionate for the subject matter and fought like hell to get it done. It’s really a tribute to people coming together and being persistent against all odds, and not because there was any big paycheck out there, because there certainly was never a promise of that with this film.
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Avast, me hearties! As I were sayin’ to me parrot t’other day, September 19th be Talk Like a Pirate Day — and, if you can remember that far back, ’twere a darned fine holiday, before the Pastafarians got to it. But sadly, Hollywood did never catch on to such a fine day — there be not one movie about pirates comin’ out this weekend! So, ’tis up to me to pirate-ify them…yaaarrgh…

Lakeview Terrace
Yaaargh…that Samuel of Jackson be one mighty bad lubber. Here he be playin’ a cop that don’t be approvin’ of interracial marriage. And since his neighbors be minglin’ and miscegenatin’, he sets out to make ‘em walk the proverbial plank. Of course, since he be the cap’n, there don’t be nuthin’ they can do. (Can’t you just hear the producer they pitched it to sayin’ “Shiver me timbers! Here there be conflict!”?)

Recommended if ye like movies about stalkers. And begad, who don’t?

Igor
Here there be monsters. Remember Frankenstein’s matey Igor? (No — not Fritz — the other one.) Well, avast, it seems that every mad scientist hath one, and they all be voiced by John Cusack! But one be rockin’ the boat — he wants to be a mad scientist himself! Yaaargh…what manner of devilry is this?

Recommended if ye liked Corpse Bride or Invader Zim

Ghost Town
Well blow me down and shiver me sails. This week, there be nuthin’ but strange, half-baked premises. In this bilge, some dentist be dyin’ on an operatin’ table during a colonoscopy. Then he be needin’ to do…somethin’. I have no idea. But I best warn ya — it be captained by David Koepp of Secret Window…

Recommended if ye been wishin’ for a sequel to Ghost Dad. (Never thought I’d be typin’ that…)

My Best Friend’s Girl
Um…yaarrgh. Here there be Dane Cook. Best chart a course far, far away, mateys.

Recommended if ye’re head be full o’ scurvy, ye’re belly be full o’ grog, and ye has an undiscriminatin’ pretty lass on ye’re arm…

Remember that “new exciting thing” I mentioned a while back? No? You mean you don’t read every ounce of wordsmithing I bleed upon these here internets? For shame. Truly, for shame. All that aside, I’m proud to announce the launch of the official MovieZeal Podcast. We’ve been hard at work fine-tuning this puppy for maximum listenability, and now we’re ready for the big show. Every other week (we’re going to do this bi-weekly, at least at first) you can hear myself, Luke Harrington, and our lovely wine diva Heather Hall (we figured we needed some feminine input) converse eloquently (or not) on all things filmic. Rather than opting for the standard podcasting format, we’ve tweaked the structure in ways that are (hopefully) interesting.

1. Each week we choose a theme. This week’s, as you can see below, is “Brothers.”

2. We pick a theatrical release based on that theme. This week it’s Burn After Reading, chosen because of the siblings behind the camera.

3. We select a wine based on the theme. Wait…a what? Yes, we drink wine on our podcast. Luke and I are ignorant in the art of the vine, but wine guru Heather has been whipping us into shape.

4. Our final segment is called The Gauntlet, where one of us forces another one to watch a film we think they will hate. You win if they hate it; you lose if they end up loving it (it’s the new game everyone is talking about!). This week we had Heather watch No Country For Old Men, anticipating that her delicate nature would be horrified by Anton Chigurh.

Additionally, we’re launching with Episode 5. Four of them are already in the can, but we wanted to get a little practice in as well as prove that we’re taking this seriously. I will post the first four episodes tomorrow in a single block and you can peruse them at your convenience. Also, we welcome feedback. Sound off in the comments section or write us at podcast [at] moviezeal [dot] com. Actually, do write us. We want to read your emails (especially if they’re nasty) on the next episode.

The podcast is directly embedded into the page for ease of listening, you can have it pop-up in its own window if your little heart desires it, or you can download it and stick it on your iPod or preferred MP3 listening doohicky. Once I get my act together I’ll have it all set up through iTunes and you can subscribe that way (that’s how I listen to my podcasts).

 

 Episode 5 - Brothers [42:28m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

EDIT: In order to get iTunes to recognize each of the podcasts, they have to exist in a separate post in the RSS feed. Sorry about the re-posting.

 

 Episode 3 - Wine Snobs [32:32m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

NOTE: In order to get iTunes to recognize each individual podcast, I have to post them to separate entries so that the RSS feed picks each of them up. Sorry for the re-posting.

 

 Episode 1 - The Jungle [47:16m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

This will become a regular feature at MovieZeal, so expect a new Mystery Poster Theater every week (I know, absolutely thrilling, isn’t it?). This time there’s nothing free in the offering, although I’m working hard to bring you more free-as-dirt goodies in the future.

I’ve selected two posters, one easier, one harder, helpfully named for those of you with reading disabilities. Guess away in the comments section. Fabulous existential prizes await!

It’s finally here, the moment I’ve been waiting 128 days for (yes, I counted), the moment that finally brings meaning and purpose to my life (ok, the hyperbole got away from me a bit there): Speed Racer can now be yours to own, forever and ever and ever! I called it “The Movie of the Year” back in May and I’m sticking to that. There’s a lot of great cinema coming out between now and December 31st, but I doubt anything can come close to the religious experience of Speed and his Mach 5.

Apart from The Greatest Movie Of ALL TIME being released (sorry, the hyperbole key got stuck again), this week is a doozy. Batten down the hatches boys and girls, there is plenty to choose from. Also, you may notice the new Amazon links. Hopefully they aren’t too obnoxious, although feel free to spout off in the comments.

Speed Racer –
Do I even need to say anything more on this? Those who read this site with any kind of regularity already know about my obsession with all things Speed. I have, bar none, never had a cinematic experience like the one I had while watching Speed Racer. It made me feel like a little kid again, and I am thrilled that the world can now begin to embrace it on DVD. If you haven’t read my review on it, read it now; be converted. Mark my words: this will be a classic within the decade.

Recommended if you trust my taste in the slightest.

| Buy Speed Racer on Blu-Ray

Young@Heart –
Only on the day Speed Racer is released could Young@Heart be pushed into second place. This is one of the best documentaries of the year and, quite frankly, it’s required viewing. Following the exploits of a geriatric chorus group that breathes new life into rock and punk anthems like “Should I Stay Or Should I Go” and “Schizophrenia”, it deals with the physical and emotional ups & downs of life after 60. The 3rd act of the film had me in tears. This is a touching, life affirming film that will stick with you long after you’ve turned off the TV.

Recommended if you liked Spellbound, The Devil and Daniel Johnston, or Buena Vista Social Club

The Rape of Europa
I’ve been hearing about this doc on the Nazi’s systematic plundering of Europe’s artistic masterpieces for quite a while now. A relatively unknown story, the film traces the theft of certain masterworks as well as the Allied attempts to thwart the crimes. It’s also narrated by Joan Allen, who hopefully redeems herself for Death Race. Then again, redemption might be an impossibility there.

Recommended if you liked Stolen, The War, or Who the #$&% is Jackson Pollack?

Hit the jump for the rest of this week’s glorious Hollywood offerings.
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This review was originally published May 10th, 2008.

This isn’t going to be a review so much as it’s going to be a sermon.

I have never experienced a film like Speed Racer before in my life. It is an exuberant, giddy, unabashed celebration of the wide-eyed wonder that shines in the eyes of little boys who believe with every ounce of their being that a 2 inch Hot Wheels car can accelerate at 500mph through a loop-de-loop, flip majestically into the air over the competition, and soar into the stratosphere with a jet-propelled rocket (which is obviously strapped to the back). Physics? Gravity? What are those things? I left the theater with a shockingly goofy grin plastered all over my face, fully believing that nothing was impossible and that no one—no one!—could tell me what I could or couldn’t do. That is the raw power of this film: to transport you to a place where the world is an epic adventure waiting to be seized, where dreams and possibilities are as big as you can imagine them, and where the crushing mundanity of adulthood is left eating the dust of the sleek, physics-defying Mach 5 driven by a boy named Speed. This is the stuff little boys’ dreams are made of, and heaven help me, I loved every thrilling second of it.
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This review was originally published April 18th, 2008.

The British-produced documentary Young@Heart opens by subjecting the audience to a most unexpected event: a 92-year-old British woman crooning The Clash’s “Should I Stay or Should I Go.” Behind her, to a packed audience, stand 20 more geriatrics stomping and dancing like they’re having the time of their lives. They are the Young@Heart chorus, and spending 107 minutes with them could prove to be one of the most joyful experiences you’ll ever have.
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