Release Dates Jul 02 2008 @ 09:30 am
Theater Releases for July 2nd, 2008
Since it’s a holiday weekend, the movies come out on Wednesday. Why? Because Hollywood wants (no — needs!) your money. The only question is…do they deserve it? Stay tuned to find out…
Hancock
Will Smith plays an inept, alcoholic superhero. Should be funny; kind of is. I caught an early showing of this one, and I have to say: it’s one of the weirdest experiences I’ve ever had with a major Hollywood release. The first half is a quirky comedy that’s a lot of fun; then it suddenly decides it wants to be an epic tragedy halfway through, and introduces all sorts of mythology that I just wasn’t ready to buy into. It’s like two completely different movies glued together. Imagine watching Highlander and Highlander II back-to-back (skipping all the credits and titles, of course) — that’s the best comparison I can think of. Is it worth seeing? Well…it’s not exactly the chameleon’s lobotomy, but the first half is almost worth the price of admission. Evan should have a full review up sometime today or tomorrow.
Recommended if you liked Mystery Men, My Super Ex-Girlfriend, or Sky High…but wished they were all trilogies, with a third chapter roughly as disappointing as The Matrix Revolutions
Kit Kittredge: An American Girl
After three made-for-TV movies, the popular American Girl franchise (which also includes books, magazines, and dolls — all of which have no doubt sucked away some of your hard-earned cash if you have daughters) makes the jump to the big screen. Um, yay? This is the story of Kit Kittredge, an American girl (get it?) who grew up during the Great Depression. It’s probably awful, but then again, where else can your nine-year-old girl go to learn self-esteem, tolerance, and American history? If I were a nine-year-old girl, I’d be all over this thing. Heck, we need an American Boy franchise. Why? Because your son ain’t learning about the Great Depression from that copy of Grand Theft Auto IV you just bought him. Think about that one.
Recommended if your daughter is sick of having her intelligence insulted by the Disney Princess line.
on Jul 02 2008 @ 10:48 am 1. Kristena said …
Kit Kittredge could be good–it does have the fantastic Abigail Breslin playing the lead. And I can definitely appreciate alternatives to Disney princesses, no matter how much I love Beauty and the Beast.
on Jul 02 2008 @ 10:59 am 2. Phillip Johnston said …
I’ve heard Kit is pretty good for a G-rated kids outing. Come to think of it, this year has been very good when it comes to kid’s movies.
on Jul 02 2008 @ 11:00 am 3. Cinexcellence said …
Mystery Men? How did that get into the recommendation list? Expound, darn it!
on Jul 02 2008 @ 11:33 am 4. Luke Harrington said …
I was looking for offbeat, superhero-oriented comedies. Mystery Men may not have been the best choice. In terms of tone (and clumsy execution), My Super Ex-Girlfriend is the best fit.
As for Kit, I’d be open to seeing it. I’m just a little wary, given its roots in merchandising.
on Jul 02 2008 @ 11:40 am 5. Phillip Johnston said …
Now I’m looking for a movie based off of Vision Forum’s Beautiful Girlhood dolls. Now that would be a camp classic.
on Jul 02 2008 @ 11:48 am 6. Luke Harrington said …
It couldn’t be too much worse than that Bratz movie…
on Jul 02 2008 @ 12:36 pm 7. Colleen said …
I Adore “Mystery Men”. If my friends all formed a league of super loosers…heros. Mystery men would just about be right. Eddie Izzard was awesome in that film. “Disco is not dead, DISCO IS LIFE”…LOL
on Jul 02 2008 @ 2:45 pm 8. Evan Derrick said …
Boy, what “Mystery Men” could have been if it had just been a little more…a little more…gosh, I don’t know, but it needed a little more something.
And Luke, I’m coming to understand that you have a special place in your heart for movies with direct merchandising tie-ins. Were you burned as a boy with Thundercats or Transformers or something?
on Jul 02 2008 @ 3:51 pm 9. Luke Harrington said …
Clearly, you didn’t see me in late 2001/early 2002, when I was buying up all the Treasure Planet merchandise I could find. But for the most part, licensed merchandise always serves one of two purposes:
1. Taking away the money of parents, most of whom have little disposable income (you, of all people, should know how much diapers cost
) but simply can’t compete with the millions of dollars that corporate America pours into research in child psychology annually
and
2. Preventing the financial independence of pathetic uber-geeks, thus forcing them to live in their parents’ basements a little longer (at least until they find a female desperate enough to let them move in
).
I can sort of get behind #2…but #1 really makes me worry about where the world is headed.
on Jul 02 2008 @ 5:07 pm 10. Evan Derrick said …
Ah, but shouldn’t parents suck it up and, you know, be parents? I understand that corporate American is particularly nasty when it comes to snagging the minds of children (the diaper aisle at Wallmart is directly across from the cookies…now why do you think that is?), but sometimes a parent just has to say no. When I watch a mom or dad give in to the demands of their screaming children, I have to shake my head. It’s not all Big Business’ fault.
Oh, and I would just like everyone to know that I coined the term ‘the chameleon’s lobotomy.’ Glad you could do your part in propagating the meme, Luke.
on Jul 02 2008 @ 8:57 pm 11. Luke Harrington said …
Hey, no arguments here — but that doesn’t mean I have to like it that there are gigantic organizations that are all essentially above the law, all spending millions to make mom and dad look like the bad guy. I’m not going to get behind something that does no good, just because it’s not directly responsible for all the bad in the world.
And, if you didn’t notice, I did link to the moment you coined the term.
on Jul 02 2008 @ 9:26 pm 12. Evan Derrick said …
Yeah, I know that you linked to it (thankyou, by the way…makes me feel all fuzzy inside), but you know how these internet memes go… if you’re not screaming your ownership over one the whole way, some 13 year old German kid in the backwoods of the internet (probably at 4Chan) is going to claim he started it himself. And then what would I have, Luke? Nothing. I would have nothing. It would definitely not be the chameleon’s lobotomy.